“Don’t let them in, don’t let them see
Be the good girl you always have to be
Conceal, don’t feel, put on a show
Make one wrong move and everyone will know”
Queen Elsa – ‘For the First Time in Forever’
From what I’ve seen in my life and in the lives of my friends and acquaintances, we all have periods in our lives—days, weeks, months, and even years—when we feel like Queen Elsa from the newest Disney fairytale, “Frozen.” If you’re like me and my friends, you will have times when you feel like you have to put up a front and pretend everything is all right all of the time! You’ll put on a mask and hide the pain, heartbreak, sadness, and anger you feel inside, because you’ll feel like if you let people see you when you’re vulnerable, they’ll think differently of you when you’re strong. So, like Elsa, you’ll become the queen of your own “kingdom of isolation.” You’ll close yourself up inside your heart and lock the door behind you. It’ll get to a point when you won’t even let your closest friends inside. You won’t explain or share your feelings; you’ll just hide away and shut everyone out. Eventually, someone or something will push you to your breaking point and you’ll explode! All that you had been hiding inside, all of your secrets and lies will be aired out in the open where everyone will be able to see your dirty laundry, at which point your theme song will probably go from being “For the First Time in Forever” to “Let It Go:”
“Couldn’t keep it in, Heaven knows I tried.
Don’t let them in, don’t let them see.
Be the good girl you always have to be.
Conceal don’t feel, don’t let them know.
Well, now they know!
Let it go, let it go!
Can’t hold it back anymore.
Let it go, let it go!
Turn away and slam the door.
I don’t care what they’re going to say.
Let the storm rage on.
The cold never bothered me anyway.”
Queen Elsa – ‘Let It Go’
Ideally, once you realize everyone knows the truth, you will also realize it’s pointless to hold your feelings and the truth inside any longer, so you’ll choose to let it go and you’ll realize how freeing it is to open up and be who you really are. You’ll stop trying so hard to be the perfect girl you always knew you could never really be and you’ll start to be the girl you were made to be. You’ll open up and let your talents, desires, and dreams take flight! You’ll stop worrying about what other people think and what they might say and you’ll start to live. You’ll let go, you’ll turn away, and you’ll slam the door in the face of anyone who tries to bring you down. Those who want to follow you will be allowed as long as they don’t try to tear you down or tell you you can’t when you know you can! You’ll only allow those people who build you up and encourage you to follow you out the door and into the world of unknown and infinite possibilities!
Ideally, that’s when all of your dreams will start to come true, when you’ll let go and let yourself feel what you never let yourself feel before—joy, hope, fear, and love! All of a sudden, your hopes and dreams will start to become real and tangible, because you’ll let people in, people who will hope, dream, and dare with you! The ice cold and rock hard barriers you’ve set around your “kingdom of isolation” will finally start to melt and you’ll learn that while isolation can be a good thing sometimes, communication and relation are more beneficial most of the time.
Letting go, allowing myself to feel every emotion inside me, and letting people in is something I struggle with on a regular basis, but when I do let go, let people in, and allow myself to feel, my life is so much better than the alternative!
I urge you, whoever you are, to let people in and let them see the girl you really are–hopes, dreams, fears, tears, and all! Let it all go and allow yourself to be the girl you were meant to be–the girl who isn’t afraid to let people see her in a vulnerable state!