‘What makes you different, makes you beautiful.’ Backstreet Boys
There are four typical kinds of people in this world—the self-satisfied, the people pleaser, the servant-hearted, and the perfectionist.
The self-satisfied are the people who don’t really care what other people or even God thinks of them. All they care about is making themselves look good. All they want to do is be successful in their own eyes, regardless of how much they have to hurt other people along the way.
The people pleaser is the person who doesn’t care about how they feel about something, nor do they care what God thinks about something. As long as the people around them approve of how they look, dress, act, and talk, the people pleaser is completely satisfied.
The legalistic are those who strive to please God by going to church every Sunday, following all of the Ten Commandments, and judging those who don’t do those things.
Finally, there is the perfectionist. The perfectionist is the person who strives not only to look good in his/her own eyes, but also in the eyes of others, as well as in the eyes of God.
God has opinion on all of these people. To the self-satisfied He says, “Pride comes before the fall.”* To the people pleaser He quotes Paul, “If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.” To the legalistic He says, “For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God,” and to the perfectionist he says, “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.”
This is not to say that we are not to try to be acceptable in our own eyes, as well as others eyes. Nor is it to say that we should not go to church and follow the commandments. We should do all of those things, but those things should not be our main focus. When we try to please ourselves, we become arrogant and-or we lose our self-confidence. When we try to please others, we will never be good enough. When we try to follow the rules, without having a relationship with God, we fall short of all of our goals. And, when we try to perfect, we only fail faster.
Often, when we try to be any of the before mentioned people, our efforts only end in depression and sometimes self-hatred, which in more cases than not, will lead to things like addiction, self-harm, eating disorders, and so forth.
However, it is possible to do all of those things without failing IF we do them correctly. In order to do them correctly, you most have faith in God. If we have faith in God, then we can have all the confidence in the world to do anything.